funny

My brother, Bill, who died in 2017, left me with lots of emails to laugh about. Here's one of them.

MURPHY'S REAL LAWS 

1.  Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film in the camera.

2.  He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

3.  Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

4.  I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

5.  Seen it all, done it all. Can't remember most of it.

6.  You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted and used against you.

7.  Honk if you love peace and quiet.

8.  It is hard to understand how a cemetery can raise its burial costs and blame it on the higher cost of living.

9.  The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

10. Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world population.

11. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

12. The shin bone is a device for finding furniture.

13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

14. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.